As we prepared to move to Cambodia, many commented on how nervous they would be to learn an Asian language, as they are noted to be more challenging to an American tongue. Although I believe these comments were made with the intention of empathizing or complimenting me in my choice, I'll admit they only unnerved me. The thought that everyone would be asking, later, if I had indeed mastered this foreign language was not helpful for my psyche. Of course I played it cool, acting as if I wasn't nervous in the least.
At first, as I had thought, the simple greetings and everyday words and phrases were quite easy to learn, but the ease of learning a new language quickly faded. The culture here is not as patient and understanding as the American culture when it comes to incorrect pronunciation. For example, let's say that I interact with a lady in the States, and upon parting she says, "sank you!" I would not feel the need to correct her by showing her how to properly pronounce the "th" phoneme in the word thank. Rather, I would smile and tell her she was welcome, grateful she was making an attempt to speak my native language while in my native country. Correct pronunciation is more important to the Khmer people. Part of this is due to the cultural idea of saving face, or in other words, not being wrong. We have been told by our Khmer teacher that parents don't praise their children, but instead focus their efforts on correcting children when they have done something wrong. Apparently, this carries over into how they deal with foreigners. There are a few who have been patient with me and even appreciated my struggles to speak their native tongue in their native country. However, most of the time, I have been met with laughter, confused looks, and impatience as they speak for me instead of letting me practice. For those who know me, you know that in general I am not an aggressive personality, intense at times, yes, but not aggressive. If anything, I tend to shrink during confrontation or correction from strangers and those with whom I'm less acquainted. I can definitely hold my own when it comes to my personal convictions, but when it's unimportant things (aka anything that's not found in God's word), I can be somewhat of a wimp. :o}
Another reason they feel the need to correct, I believe, is due to their limited exposure to other cultures. In America, at least the area where I am from, we are surrounded by cultures and ethnicities of every kind. I have never expected a foreigner to learn English, but have always appreciated any efforts made. With that said, I would never expect that an English-speaking American should be required to learn another language for the sake of those moving into their country. I carried this view with me to Cambodia, and even though I have no intentions of living here long-term, I still want to do my best to show the people I care enough for them to make an effort to learn their language and customs. Since Paul saw fit to become everything to every man, I don't feel that I can do any less. So, I strive to learn this language, despite the lack of support. Their correction and impatience have taken their toll though, as I now become very nervous anytime I attempt to converse in Khmer. That, along with knowing I only have 9 months left in this country doesn't provide me with much encouragement to tackle the language, but I am doing my best to increase my Khmer skills and knowledge.
I love Mr. Sokcheat. In Khmer he reminds me that:
You is kind.
You is smart.
You is important.
One funny thing about being here, is how my languages get crossed sometimes. With so many Khmer locals, and a plethora of transient foreigners from all around the world, I find myself saying phrases such as the following:
• "adios amigo" - I've said this to several people, Khmer and foreign, but none of them speak Spanish
• "pardon(with French accent) bong(Khmer word for friend/brother)"
• "parlez-vous Khmer?"
• "holã lok srey(female shop owner)"
• "ahkun(thanks in Khmer) monsieur"
• "bonjorno mademoiselle"
• "I tov(go) to the psah(market)"
The list could continue, but I think you get the point. With several languages bouncing around in my head, and being fluent in only one of them, things get a little mixed up at times. It can be annoying, but usually I'm able to laugh at myself.
After returning from our summer trip to the States, I knew it would be a challenge to get back into the swing of things, but it has felt like an uphill battle. To begin with, 5 weeks away with no exposure or Khmer practice hurt me. To add to that, upon our return, we discovered that our Khmer tutor had been blessed with a steady position at the American Embassy. I am so thankful for this opportunity for him. For us, however, it has meant that he has been available for only 2 lessons in 6 weeks. Originally, with Bradley's school schedule, we only take 2 lessons a week, instead of the recommended 3-a-week. Since Jonathan and Marissa began their lessons more than a month before us, our American companions were finished with both of their workbooks before we had completed 3/4 of our first book. With a stronger grasp of the language, Missy has even begun speaking for me. She does an excellent job communicating with our Khmer sisters and friends, while I'm still relying on my smile and greetings in forming connections. This has left me feeling less than adequate, although I'm grateful it's not the other way around, seeing as the Edwards plan to be here longer than us.
Bradley has been my encourager and prayer has been my comfort. The likelihood I will ever master the Khmer language is slim, and because of this, I am even more thankful for the blessing of knowing that my Savior can tear down any and every barrier. Who knows? Maybe my lacking in this talent will allow the Khmer believers to learn to rely on each other more than on me; or maybe it makes no difference at all. Whatever the case, I will do my best to reach out to whoever will allow me to do so, in whatever way I am able. Again, I find comfort in Paul's words as he said that love is greater than speaking in tongues. I could master Khmer and every other language in the world, but if love is not my motivation in everything I do, then it is in vain.
I love to hear from my friends and family! I have some questions below, and will look forward to reading your answers. Until then, au revoir mis amigos! ;o)
• What is your favorite language, aside from your native tongue?
• Have you ever mixed languages unintentionally?
• Have you ever dreamed in a foreign language?
• Do you recall a specific instance where you felt inadequate to the point you were discouraged?
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