Before & After: Living Space & Kitchen

As I sit here, surrounded by suitcases and lots of stuff, I am happy to think of only a few weeks ago when my home was in order... when my home was my home. It is slowly but surely becoming another place in which we lived one time. So, before we no longer live here, I thought it a good idea to share our final before & after photos.

Every one deals with transition differently. For some transition is less upsetting than the actual change itself. For me, the transition does a number on this restless mind, but then once the change comes, peace returns. I remember stressing to no end about my wedding day, until the day actually arrived. My maid of honor was staring at me funny when we were getting our nails done, and I asked her what was the matter. She said she was concerned about how calm I had become. I laughed and stated, "The day has arrived. If something is not done, it most likely won't be finished. So, why stress about it? As long as Bradley and I are married at the end of the day, it will have been a successful day." She still watched me with an unsure eye, but I believed what I had said. And I still do. There is a point you reach during transition where you cannot go back. Time will not stop for you to finish, undo, or redo something. So, my mind can handle the actual presence of change better than this lack-of-routine-because-any-routine-is-out-the-door-since-everything-is-about-to-change state of being. I want to just have everything sold, gifted, and packed in 1-2 days. There's that "I want to be in control" monster rearing its ugly head again. Instead, I will choose to remember that God is in control, and I can only do my best. The rest is in His hands. In the meantime, I am choosing to take a break and virtually walk through our home before our possessions exploded all over the place.

As in my previous 'before & after' posts, I approached our living space with a desire for peace with a cup of comfort, and a dash of fun.

BEFORE

Empty, dingy, peach, and ready to be revived.

Orange doors and a nook... ideas begin to formulate...

Great medallions, but I was not crazy about the lighting.

AFTER

*sigh* B built a sofa frame from up cycled pallets, and
Marissa lent her sewing machine and seamstress skills to
help me make the cushion and pillow covers.

Come on in and sit down...

Whenever we have company, the casters allow us
to use the sofas as extra seating.

I am so thankful we chose to paint the walls in this soft grey.
B also built the shelf and table. I heart him!

In everything we have done to our flat, we had to weigh out what was worth the cost and effort. Since our stay was temporary, some things were not worth our time, even though we would have loved the improvement to the space. So, we upgraded what we could without busting either our butts or budget.

Now, we come to the kitchen. I would not be surprised if most American women would choose either their closet or their kitchen to be the largest room. ;o) Well, when we chose this flat, we immediately knew that a large kitchen was not in our near future. I knew that with my creative skills and Bradley's crafting skills, that we could create a decent kitchenette anywhere we chose. So, a small kitchen that was separated from the main living area was not too daunting for us. However, after having lived with the pain of running back and forth between kitchen and kitchenette, I do feel differently about our choice. We were able to create a great space, but I would have either invested in a sink option of sorts for the kitchenette, or I would have configured the kitchen space very differently to allow for more storage. Since heavy rain floods the kitchen, I probably would have chosen the first option, but we will never know. Now, onto our kitchen transformation.

BEFORE

The kitchen is located right outside the front door.
Bradley is entering. What will he find?

A beehive! Thankfully it is vacant.

Before the beehive-ectomy. 

Before the tin roof was added... small room for sure.

Storage? Storage! Is that really enough storage?

AFTER

The kitchen is my washing station.
No food prep, but some food storage.

For some reason we did not add this fan until we returned
home from the states. I used to be dripping in sweat by the
time I finished the dishes due to no air circulation. Man,
sometimes I am dumb... but now I am cool. Get it?

My cleaning supplies and my WASHER!!!!

When we first arrived, I decided to pioneer the laundry and do all of it by hand. Well, that lasted about 4 months, and then the Edwards purchased a washing machine. They were generous enough to let me use it whenever I came to watch the kiddos, and it allowed me to only do 2-4 loads of laundry by hand per month instead of per week. Once they moved across town, we would take our laundry on Sundays, but it was a hassle to haul everything back and forth. Plus, we really felt like laundry bums, even though Jonathan and Marissa never demonstrated anything but generosity toward us. I really wanted a washer of my own, and we had even saved up enough money to purchase one. However, the problem was where to put the machine since our flat was not really set up for the beast. The drain line was the main issue since it has to lie flat and its length is restricted to avoid issues. So, placing the washer inside was not an option, but then, of course, there's the weather to consider. During the dry season, a washer outside would undoubtedly suffer from the dust and grit that would cling to it within minutes, happily building decaying layers in days. Then, during the rainy season, how would one keep an outside washer dry?

Well, while visiting a friend's apartment, I noticed that her washer was outside on her balcony, with a plastic, rain-proof cover. LIGHT BULB! Why had I not thought of using a heavy duty rain poncho? There was still the issue of the drain line though, but Bradley and I put our heads together to solve another problem. So, I have been happily washing laundry in my own washing machine, in my own home for nearly 9 months now! It has been wonderful, and every time I wheel out the washer to hook it up for use, I take a moment to thank my Heavenly Father for such a simple yet huge blessing. I hope I never take having a washing machine for granted again.

Since the kitchen is a cleaning and storage station, we needed a place for cooking and food preparation. Bradley used his skills to craft yet another beautiful area for just this task. This is our buffet, and aside from not having a sink, it works perfectly for our needs. The higher counter top prevents back strain (since the Khmer people tend to be shorter, and often prepare their food on the floor, the counter tops here are usually very short), and the metal cabinet keeps our dishes dust free while housing the burners on top. Although I would have preferred a different style of cabinet, the piece has served us well.

AFTER

(The before is above since it is one big room.)

This custom-built shelf plays the role of an open pantry.

Again the grated windows come in handy > hanging pots.

Bradley made this shelf for his coffee... I get to use it too. ;o)

Although a part of me is saddened to be tearing down this little home we have built, I am so thankful that we had the blessing of living here, even if temporarily. Living abroad has truly taught us that home is where the heart is, and our heart is with our Lord and with each other. So, wherever we go, no matter how many before and afters we undertake, we will always be home. Cheers!

Do you handle the transition stage or the actual change better?
Which room in your home is the most important to you?
(Special thanks to my FB friends who try to respond and/or answer every time!)

A-N-X-I-E-T-Y

In case you have not heard, we are moving. Across the world. Again.

But you say, "Brandi, there is no need to worry because you are coming home. America is your home, remember?" Then I say, "Umm, are you sure? I feel pretty 'at home' here... in Cambodia because, you know, I live here. My home is here. My life is here. Right?" Then you retort, "but Brandi your family and friends are waiting for you. Are you not excited to be with and around them again?" Of course I reply, "YES! I am so ready to love on my littles, chat and laugh with my girlfriends, and make more memories with family. But for 2 years I have lived a completely different life in a completely different country. I am not the same person I was when I left America. How do I deal with this?" Your patient response, "You let us welcome you home. You worry about getting here, and we will take care of the rest. Sound good?" Nervously, I smile, not wanting to seem ungrateful, "Well, yes, that does sound good, but it seems more easily said than done. I mean, I have so much to sell and pack; friends I have no desire to leave; people depending on me; and I somehow have to keep my sanity as I say goodbye again. Do you understand?" Kindly you comfort me, "Oh Brandi, you are stronger than you think. Just remember to lean on God and He will get you through. Plus, on the other side of all of your goodbyes will be a bunch of hello agains. Your friends and family love you and are anxiously waiting to have you back."

There's that word: anxious. Yep. Been feeling that recently. In less than 8 weeks my life will drastically change again, and my little self is struggling with so many thoughts, emotions, and tasks. I would imagine that to anyone who has never lived outside of their home country, this may seem silly. Coming home seems like the most natural thing to do, but humor me for a moment. For those who have moved out and away from home, whether married or single, think of how different 'home' is once you have your own home. If you are blessed with a happy and healthy family, then your parent's and/or grandparent's home is still a comfortable, wonderful place to visit, but there is a reason for the phrase, "you can't go home again". You have rituals, habits, routines, styles, and items in your home that are simply you. No one may be able to make cookies like mom, but no one has a better, safer, more comfortable bed than you do, in your own home. Now, for those who have never moved back home to mom and dad, imagine doing so. I am sure any one can think of a few things that might go wrong, even if nothing done is, in itself, wrong. But since every circumstance in life changes us as individuals, although your core personality may always be there, we can become very different people over the passage of time. I am a very different person, but I am still me. I am nervous to come home to a country, a congregation, a family, and a life that is very different from whenever I left two years ago. Anxiety has crept in, and I must find a way to deal with it all. Scripture has been my heart's greatest comfort, and writing is my brain's. So, ahem, I feel the need to let my inner diva pen my thoughts in lyric. Although I do not condone all of the words used in the original song, Glamorous is my inspiration. I found a clean karaoke version... you know... just in case someone would be interested in de-stressing through tunes. And yes, I had a blast singing this.

https://youtu.be/ZNCk-xcKW6Y

Oh, and we may have made an audio recording. To listen to the sounds of B-rad and Bran Muffin click below:

*Tuk tuks are the moto taxis they have in Cambodia. Although enjoyable, they are not the fastest mode of transportation. **Mangosteens are a delicious fruit that look like a cross between an eggplant and a pumpkin, and taste of juicy awesomeness!

Just give in and sing it Fergie style...
............................................
Are you ready?

Since you ain't in control, bring your broke self Home
Since you ain't in control, bring your broke self Home

A-N-X-I-E-T-wah-wah-Y, yeah A-N-X-I-E-T-wah-wah-Y

We're flyin' third class, up in the sky
Drinkin' ginger ale, livin' my life
In the tuk tuk lane, not ready for change*
Oh the anxiety, ooh, the fluster, fluster
The anxiety, anxie-anxiety, the anxiety,
Ooh the fluster, fluster
The anxiety, anxie-anxiety, the anxiety,
Ooh the fluster, fluster

Sort and sift through every thing
I'll be crowned the packin' queen
What if I forget something?
With all this dust how can I clean?
Chat with fam on the Skype scene
Gonna miss my mangosteen**
Sweatin' so much it's obscene
Coatin' on the sunscreen
Chillin' in the Edwards' canteen
Gabe's made a submarine
List-en-ing to Evie sing
Penny I'm not your trampoline
Bible studies, ready to glean
Dinner guests? I need caffeine.

Sippin', reminiscing on days when I had a routine, and now I'm

third class, up in the sky
Drinkin' ginger ale, livin' my life
In the tuk tuk lane, not ready for change
Oh the anxiety, ooh, the fluster, fluster
The anxiety, anxie-anxiety, the anxiety,
Ooh the fluster, fluster
The anxiety, anxie-anxiety, the anxiety,
Ooh the fluster, fluster

[skip bridge]

A-N-X-I-E-T-wah-wah-Y, yeah A-N-X-I-E-T-wah-wah-Y

We're flyin' third class, up in the sky
Drinkin' ginger ale, livin' my life
In the tuk tuk lane, not ready for change
Oh the anxiety, ooh, the fluster, fluster
The anxiety, anxie-anxiety, the anxiety,
Ooh the fluster, fluster
The anxiety, anxie-anxiety, the anxiety,
Ooh the fluster, fluster

I got plannin' up to here
Khmer music in my ear
Singin' all these crazy things that I don't understand
Blessed with money in the bank
And I'd really like to thank
There's so many I could thank
Thank you really though
Cause I've never had a day
When I'd worry about pay
Since the church takes care of us, all the Christian folk
Man, it's been a long road and now it's time to go
My Heavenly Father's in control,
He let this daughter know

Since you ain't in control, bring your broke self Home
My Father told me so
Since you ain't in control, bring your broke self Home
He let this daughter know
Since you ain't in control, bring your broke self Home
My Father told me so
Since you ain't in control, bring your broke self Home
He let this daughter know
............................................

If you have not yet figured out that I am quirky, you have now. I pray, sing, and vent to loved ones whenever I am faced with anxiety. How about you? Oh, and if you read my previous post on preferring writing to cooking, these lyrics took me less than an hour... dinner took over two. Oh the fluster, fluster! Okay, I'm out yo. Peace!

Betty Crockett Rides Again

Almost two years ago Bradley and I set out on the wild frontier, ready, we thought, for anything. Now, I have never fancied myself an amazing cook, and I willingly admit to being a poor baker. However, in the states I had practically mastered crockpot meals and boxed baked goods, when the need arose. Working full-time away from home, it had taken me several years to get into a groove that was both budget friendly and manageable for my schedule. Following our move here, I realized how well-oiled my cooking, grocery shopping machine had been. After moving out of the comfort of the hotel, not only did I struggle with meal planning, since the street markets do not always have the same produce available, but there were plenty of new and strange foods in place of the edible fare to which I had become accustomed to in the states. Although I had anticipated different cuisine in Cambodia, I was not prepared for the inconsistency of food availability, nor was I ready to take on eating Khmer food for every meal. Frustrated, I tried to figure out how to hit this curve ball that I had been thrown.

During our preparation for this mission work, Jonathan had kindly given us material to read that discussed the "do's" and "don'ts" of mission work. One section explained the problem of Going Native versus Cultural Isolation. It explored the tendency for missionaries to either try to infuse themselves into the culture to the point of denying their own identity, hence "going native." The other side is that of those who lock themselves away in their culture bubble in a way that never allows them to experience the culture and the people to whom they serve. Both of these tendencies have proven unsuccessful. With the first, one is ignoring the fact they are not, and never will be "one of them," and in trying to become one of them, one makes it that much more obvious that they are indeed different. The isolation factor is more visibly evident, as the person falling into this way of life is blatantly different, and will therefore never be accepted by the people from whom they have removed themselves. The author recommends finding a healthy balance of infusion between your culture and theirs. Remembering that you are the foreigner who needs to yield, while still allowing yourself certain comforts and familiarities of your homeland. I have striven to find this balance for Bradley and I, and although I cannot admit to 100% success, I feel that overall success has been achieved.

One way we chose to find balance was with our meals. Like every other Khmer home, we always have rice available for ourselves and others; we are ready to eat on the floor, if our guests are more comfortable with that practice; and at least 90% of our produce comes from the street markets. However, being American, we always have oats available for oatmeal for breakfast; we dine regularly on our table or couch, as is the practice of our homeland; and all of our meat comes packaged and refrigerated from the super markets. Throughout the month I sprinkle in Khmer dishes, whenever they work and sound yummy, but like back home, the majority of our diet consists of Tex-Mex type meals. Marissa discovered an awesome tortilla recipe that she was kind enough to share, and it has become one of my favorite things to prepare, as I know the pleasure awaiting my palette once that dough comes together. Never in my life has so much of my time been consumed by food preparation, and then the inconvenience of not having a sink in my prep area does not help. The first several months were rocky in my kitchen, as I worked to find new ways to make familiar meals with sometimes unfamiliar ingredients and/or methods, but for over a year now I have felt confident "stepping into my apron."

Unfortunately, I still struggle finding fulfillment in food preparation. Naturally, I am not a food person. I so enjoy food, but I am one of those weirdos who does not understand how food and conversation go together. If you have spent much time around me, you may have noticed that at get togethers, I tend to be eating by myself, or one of the last ones who sits down to eat. This has nothing to do with not wanting to be with people, but quite the opposite. I do not know anyone who would argue the fact that I enjoy talking and am eager to share a good story, but when it comes to food, I just want to eat. My mother used to get on to me for scarfing my meals down, but I never understood why. I was hungry, and in sitting down to eat, my goal was to end that hunger. Talking only slows that process, and as long as I am chewing properly, there is no reason to slow down... at least in my mind that makes sense. So, for me, food is a necessity, rather than an event. Well, if you know my husband, he is "normal" when it comes to his food habits. Not only is it an event, the more people to converse with during a meal, the better. I have had to learn that although I would be fine with a bowl of cereal or a baked potato for a meal, my husband feels loved when I put in the effort to care for his culinary needs. I am ashamed to admit that the thought of stopping whatever I am doing to spend 2-4 hours preparing and cleaning up after mealtime is frustrating. It makes me feel derailed... even though it is my job. Part of this frustration comes from not having children. I never dreamed I would be a housewife without children. When I watched the boys, food preparation was just a part of my day. Since children center me, I was able to accomplish so much when I had Zach and Max as a part of my day, life, and job. Even though I want to serve Bradley in this capacity, I have to fight the thought "but he can feed himself," and then I feel like a jerk. A while back Bradley shared with me that he feels the most loved and cared for when I take care of our meals. Aside from the pang of guilt I felt, this knowledge was a boost to my frame of mind: to know that I can say "I love you" without saying a word is encouraging. It has inspired me to step outside of my comfort zone. Even though baking in Cambodia is not ideal, I have taken up my rubber spatulas in the name of love!

In an attempt to make food more of an event, and more enjoyable for myself, I turn on music fitting for the cuisine. We play a lot of Latino Jazz during meal preparations, but both old-fashioned Italian and classic country (for southern-style cooking) make regular appearances in our home. Here are a few of my creations over the past year-and-a-half...

Fajitas with homemade tortillas and Mexican rice

Homemade spring rolls and sweet chili sauce

Offical Khmer dish: Lok Lak with beef

Homemade tomato sauce with fettuccine; home-
made focaccia {one of my favs!!!}; and
sparkling strawberry juice - delizioso!

Jalapéno cheese pizza with bread machine pizza
crust and garlic cheese bread (ever since Jonathan
found affordable cheese we have gone crazy
with the dairy delight)

 Jalapéno chicken cheese enchiladas with sour
cream sauce featuring those awesome homemade
tortillas - muy bien!

Homemade creamed corn; mashed potatoes; bread
machine rolls; steak fingers made with pork since
it is less expensive and more available; we topped
it off with oolong sweet tea - finger lickin' good!

Homemade garlic naan with curry rice and butter
chicken (not from scratch, but altered the sauce
to be less tomato-y) - बहुत अच्छा (bahut achchha)!

Traditionally this Indian bread is prepared over the
grill, but we opted to do it in our non-stick skillet...
umm, no complaints whatsoever. They were
fluffier, which is a plus in my cook book.

Although I am no where near mastering the mighty spatula, I feel much more at home in the kitchen, and am willing to step outside of my comfort zone to try new things... even from scratch. To some this seems so silly, but to me composing an outline and writing an essay is a piece of cake... for me that is easier and more enjoyable than making a piece of cake. ;o) Never did I dream that I would be spending so much time and effort on food when we committed to this work, but I have. However, I have a feeling Elijah never dreamed of lying beside a brook for more than the length of a nap, but I have learned that we are not always called to do what fulfills us... I guess that is because it is not about us. So, I have striven to keep my hands busy, my kitchen filled, and my husband happy. In turn, I have found joy in touring the world through my stomach, and I feel blessed that our Heavenly Father has provided the means for us to relish such a variety of flavors. My hat goes off to those around the world who can pick up a spoon and whip up any culinary delight at a moment's notice. Know that you have a gift, and that I, for one, admire your talent. I may not win every cooking battle, but whenever it is appropriate, I will always remember the á la mode! Cheers!

Are you thrilled every time you step into your apron?
What are some of your favorite culinary adventures?

Before & After: The Bedroom (boentup khang)

As we prepare to enter our last month of normality in our home here, I thought I should share another set of before and after photos. This post focuses on our bedroom, which in Khmer is pronounced "bahn-tohpe kaing(h)," literally sleeping room. In my previous before & after (http://sipofbrandi.blogspot.com/2015/08/before-after-bathroom-boentup-duk.html), I discussed how much Bradley and I enjoy up-cycling things to create a peaceful and beautiful space for ourselves, as well as friends and family. After our bathroom, the bedroom was the next room we tackled.

My goal was for this room to be our retreat away from the stress, schedules, and discomforts of life in Cambodia. At first we bought a foam mattress, thinking cheaper was better since it was only for 2 years. However, after 3 months of feeling physically and mentally drained due to the lack of rest, we began to reconsider our decision. There were nights where I would wake up because every single limb, yes, both of my entire arms and legs were asleep, and, no, I do not mean they were resting. I would attempt to get the blood flowing to my extremities, but it was quite a task since sitting up was about the only support I could give myself with spaghetti noodles for legs. Yes, I realize how comical this is to imagine... and probably to see. However, when it becomes a normal part of your sleeping routine to wake up different parts of your body so you can then try to go back to sleep, it begins to lose its humor, especially when you are one that already struggles with turning off your brain for bedtime. For some relief, we placed our sleeping pads (for camping) underneath our mattress to add some much needed support. This did help a little, but not enough...

After discussing how we both felt like we had aged roughly 40 years in the several months we had been "sleeping" on our cheap foam mattress, we made the decision to go mattress hunting. Bradley and I have slept on a full-size mattress since we were first married, and this size is apparently a rare request in the mattress shops here. Since the shops had plenty of king-size beds ready and available, my guess is that here, most people who can afford a "fancy" mattress want to go big. So, our full-size bed had to be special ordered, thankfully at no extra cost. Unfortunately, it meant another 1-2 months of sleeping on our foam nightmare, but the simple fact of knowing that a good night's rest was on it's way, was quite a comfort. Within the first week of our real mattress arriving, we both felt the difference. I was sleeping through the night, and Bradley was feeling much less pain in the mornings. Most importantly, we were both feeling rested, and could therefore be of better use to the Lord and the work in Cambodia.

Before we had made this glorious choice, I continued to busy myself with setting up our sleeping quarters. We purchased a wooden bed frame at a height that would allow us to store our luggage underneath. This would allow us to keep these unused, but necessary items out of the way, as well as use them for extra storage. In planning for our move here, I had brought certain toiletries, oils, and then was blessed by friends and family sending us some items we could not locate here. The suitcase under my side houses all of these unused items until they are needed, and Bradley's suitcase on his side holds all of our travel and camping gear for trips to the province. The 2 other suitcases hold our carry-on luggage and some other random items. It has been such a mental blessing to have all of our luggage out of sight, allowing us to feel more settled and at home, and less like we are just waiting to move again.

BEFORE

Not bad, but not what I would consider a warm,

peaceful and cozy space...yet.

AFTER

Faded peach is now a calming aqua mint; the wall

fan has been moved, replaced with a gorgeous hunk

of wood that Vanny rescued for us from a cobra

mound - crazy boys!; and Bradley has made

us a headboard with built-in side tables.

This banner is one of my favorite additions. I think

the sentiment is fitting for our relationship and life.

I hand-painted the words, and then burned the outer

edges of each card to create a worn effect. I cut the

flowers from card stock and strung them on jute rope.

At night our built-in headboard lamps are so warm and cozy!

{thank you hubby!}

BEFORE

Nothing wrong, but nothing inspiring either.

AFTER

We purchased a banana leaf shelf to hold our folded

clothes, oils, and some other little tidbits. The iron

grates Cambodia places on every window has come

in handy for us with "S" hooks. The wall fan has

replaced what was once a sconce, and the clothing

rod is angled in the corner, to allow a sense of space.

As a huge fan of The Mary Tyler Moore show, like

Mary's "M," this "B" symbolizes that I am home. 

My homemade jewelry rack - I raided Bradley's

"junk I have already collected in a new country" stash.

Then I stamped "jewelry" on it... you know, in

case I happen to forget what this is for... ;o)

BEFORE

This is the hallway light, but it is how all of our lights

looked... before we had our way with them.

AFTER

A large bird cage, several wires, a little more aqua mint

paint, and quite a few cheese cloths yielded our new

 bedroom chandelier. I love the starburst affect! 

Funny story on this bird cage. The Khmer Rouge discouraged art and creativity on any level, since it was seen as a form of self, and therefore rebellion to the cause. Because of this, we have come to realize that a lot of our Khmer neighbors and friends have not been taught or encouraged to think outside of the box. When Thida popped over to visit with us while we painted, she noticed the bird cage on the ground, and inquired about our purchase. I explained that I was going to turn it into a light, but she did not understand. She continued explaining to me that "in Cambodia, when you buy this, people will think you are going to buy a bird," and "but in Cambodia this is for a bird." I finally gave up, and agreed that yes, a bird cage is indeed for a bird. It was fun to see her face light up once she saw it in its place. I am not sure if she fully approved, but she admitted to being slightly impressed. Oh, Thida! ;o)

BEFORE

Again, not bad, but not for us...

AFTER

Bradley built this GORGEOUS vanity!!! I love

everything about this little space, from the mirror

to the hamper. It's organized, functional, and pretty.

Another great story... When we first moved into our flat, in our "alleyway" leading to our staircase, Bradley spotted a discarded pallet. He asked our landlord if they had any plans to use the wood. She said they had no plans and giggled. Bradley then asked if he could use it himself. Both Srey Muht and her former husband, Mac seemed confused by this request, but were happy to oblige their new tenant with their trash. After Bradley finished his build, we invited them up to see what we had done with their space, and they were very impressed. Although originally, Srey Muht had asked that we not make any holes in the walls, after seeing this, she declared that we could do whatever we wanted with the flat. This was a proud-happy moment for us. Never again has our landlord laughed at our dragging "trash" up the stairs, but instead, she asks with excitement, "what are you making now?"

My 2 favorite items:

1) The little metal tray next to the sink that holds three

 glasses filled with cotton pads, q-tips, and cotton balls. I snuck

it in my luggage during the moving process, before Bradley

could see. I knew it would make us happy once we arrived.

2) My Volcano candle from Anthropologie. *sigh*

At the end of every day, our bedroom gently eases us into our nighttime routine. It provides a comfortable place to rest after a fulfilling day, and has been a refuge - a place where we can shut the world out- on those days when it seems too much to bear. Although I am looking forward to resting our heads in a new home soon, this room will always hold a special place in my memory. It is such a blessing to be able to create a place that enables us greater joy and rest. Here's to joyful resting, wherever you rest your weary head. Cheers!

Riepjam or The Engagement

The Khmer word for engagement or preparation is riepjam, pronounced "re-ep-jahm." Every culture has their own spin on the prenuptial experience, and after attending our Landlord's engagement ceremony, I would say the Khmer engagement is a cross between an American engagement party and a traditional Jewish betrothal, with a SouthEast Aisan flare of course.

A couple of months ago, our Landlord arrived home to announce that she had been successful in finding a husband in Austraila (husband hunting is an acceptable career here), and as her luck would have it, he happens to be Khmer too. She was adorable with her excitement in having found a man who would support her and who also has a desire for children. In sharing her good fortune, she requested our presence at their engagement ceremony early the next morning. We happily accepted, and went about the task of trying our best to guess how to dress for such an occasion. Since we have now attended two Khmer weddings, we felt fairly confident in our choice of apparel, even though we felt a little silly dressing up to walk down stairs... then we entered their home feeling a little under dressed...

Their living room had been transformed into a small

parlor/pagoda/something-unique-to-Cambodia with

our landlord and her fiancé's names for all to see.

The middle of the room was covered with gifts of fruit.

Since we had come empty-handed, I began to worry, but my fears were soon squelched as everyone hurried to find us a good seat and sneak pictures of the white people who live upstairs. Every one was wearing their best, and the ceremony began... I think.

The monk/ordinator gentleman read and chanted some stuff, and occasionally the ladies, who we believed to be the mothers and aunts of the couple, would verbally agree with whatever he was saying. The men appeared bored and uncomfortable, and the women were excited and/or outwardly acknowledged the importance of this moment... so pretty much the same as back home, minus the whole Cambodian chant part. ;o)

Every time the gentleman began a new part of the ceremony, we would look around to see if we were supposed to do something, but usually the men looked as lost and confused as we were, while the women were busy taking pictures or whispering... maybe our cultures are not as different as I had once thought...

Just when we were beginning to wonder if the couple would be included in their engagement ceremony, the lovely couple appeared... for a moment. Then they were gone again, and the gentleman resumed his speech.

Her fiancé has grown accustomed to his A/C in Australia,

and he was sweating more than Bradley and I were... poor guy.

Banana leaf folding 101

For this part of the ceremony, the leader guy (sorry I do not know what they are called) took a leaf and began to fold it as he told a story. It was hard not to chuckle as the ladies did their best to act like they knew what they were doing. Then they passed the leaf envelope around for each of us to hold... maybe signifying everyone's approval and acceptance of this union? 

Candle ceremony uniting the families.

Fingerprint ceremony... just in case... you never know...

Finally! The couple are asked to join their ceremony.

Is she not adorable!?

The couple accepting their commitment... I think...

This was fun to watch since he could not figure out

when or how to do anything... she was glad to help though.

After the ceremony concluded, lots of photos were taken, and they wanted us included in their memories. So we stood with the couple for a photo or two before being dismissed to go rest while they prepared lunch. We were unsure if we were supposed to stay dressy or dress down for lunch, so we opted for the first in case their were all garbed up still. When we arrived for lunch they were happy to share their fruit bounty and a lettuce wrap type of dish. We practiced our Khmer with their family and friends who were now all dressed in street clothes... oh well.

We felt blessed to be welcomed into Srey Muht's home, and on such a special occasion too.

This is a persimmon.

Bradley: "Take this picture for Aubrey."

Aubrey, if Carli reads this to you, you can know that you and your persimmon cobbler are thought of every time we see the monster persimmons here. RIP persimmon cobbler. No, seriously, do not ever resurrect that thing. Please.

If you have any funny, interesting or unique engagement stories or experiences, please share. Cheers!

Out with the New, and In with the Old

Yes, you read that correctly. In this first month of this new year, many around the world are working on throwing out bad habits, promoting healthy practices, and creating new goals. It is peculiar how when most people I know are chanting the mantra, "out with the old, in with the new," I am doing the opposite. As this new year gets under way, I am dumbstruck with the fact that we are officially in countdown mode for moving home.

How did this happen?
Where did the time go?
Why am I so conflicted about moving home?

So many emotions, thoughts, and questions continue running through my head, and sleep has not come as easily these past few weeks. Bradley and I have already had our family business meeting in preparation for the rest of our stay here, and it is surreal to calendar deadlines to sell our furniture, rent out our flat, and purchase our airline tickets. As I entered the numerous dates into our calendar, I was excited to have deadlines, as I work well under pressure, but I also struggled with this tug of sadness. This inner turmoil is so strange, although not foreign.

Foreign.

What does that even mean anymore? When I first came to Cambodia, foreign meant from a different country, but, for me, its meaning has evolved. Now, the idea of moving to America seems foreign. Even though I am anxious to return to the modern conveniences and comforts to which I am accustomed, this dusty, crowded country has become comfortable, and leaving is, well, strange.

Although we have done our best to be minimalistic in our purchases, we have accrued quite a bit of things during our year and a half. Soon, all of these "new" things will need to go. Some items will be sold, some shared with others, some tossed, as they have seen better days, and a few select possessions will make the trek home with us in 5 months. When we arrive home, I will have the lovely task of sorting through all of our belongings which are stored in 6 different locations - yeah, I am really jazzed about that. *eye roll* So, essentially we will be getting rid of new things so that we can in turn, go home to our old things. Our view on what we need has been drastically altered by our life in Cambodia. There are numerous things that will now be easy to part with, knowing that so many have so much less in this world. We are even considering moving into a tiny home when we return, since it may be the best solution for our new life situation.

Things are not the only new-to-old on our minds. We have made new friends here, both local and foreign. The thought of leaving the Chans breaks our hearts. Our brother and sister in Christ have been such a precious blessing to us in our work here. Leaving the Edwards will be sad, and knowing that, Lord willing, it is only for a short time, lessens the sting. Then I think of Karen, Nika, Sokcheat, Trina, Chris, Navi, Thida, Seyha, Senyn, and the list continues. All of these new friends have shared in my life in this Asian Kingdom, and it saddens me to contemplate leaving.

 So many firsts have occurred, and so many memories have been made...

first plane ride to Cambodia together...

first tuk tuk ride...

first communion...

first playtime before our first service...

first Sunday lunch...

first meeting with the landlord...

first contract signing...

first moto ride to our new home...

first Khmer-like load...

oh, and yes, I rode on the back of that... somehow...

first meal in our new home...

first game in their new home while mommy

and daddy take care of business...

first road trip...

first bible study in a new place...

first best friend in a new country...

As sorrowful as it is to imagine leaving our life and friends here, to think of returning home to my old friends lifts my spirit. All of the familiar faces, smiles, and hugs bring a smile to my own face. Vanny has made me sad several times, asking us to stay longer, but the thought of not being home with my family is too overwhelming. Aside from that, Bradley and I put our lives on hold for this work, and although we are the better for it, we are ready to move forward. We still have a hope for children; we have plans for a business; and we are excited to be a part of a work in our homeland.

We plan to stay situated in our flat until mid-April, as my brother, Byron will be visiting us the first week of that month. I have wondered what he will think about both our place and us. How much change has occurred since his last visit in January of 2015? So much has happened. At that time we were roughly 65% moved into our home, and I was enduring the homesick blues, something about which I had been warned by an experienced sister who had also done foreign work. Now, our home is very much lived in, and the homesick blues are long gone. I am proud of the home we have made together, and even though I often yearn to either turn down the heat or have A/C in the living space, I absolutely love being in my home. God has been so good to us here, as He has always been. I am enjoying each page of this final chapter in Cambodia, and am also thrilled to dive into the new chapter and whatever adventures it may hold. With the Lord's help, we are prepared to do whatever He needs, as we slowly welcome His shift in our focus to "out with the new, and in with the old."

Do you have any new year plans or goals?
Have you ever had the focus of "out with the new and in with the old?"